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You know how they say that some people can never get enough? No matter how much they have they will always want more?
I have noticed something about myself. I am the type of person who is always striving to achieve more in life. I will set a goal and work hard to achieve it. I'll put all of myself into it because its a challenge and its fun to push myself past my comfort zone to do things I never dreamed were possible. I really enjoy the thrill of the chase but with one caveat... when I finally arrive at my goal I feel sort of empty like I lost something because I can no longer enjoy the thrill and excitement of pursuing my goal. Then I wander around aimlessly for awhile till I find a new goal which sparks my interest and the cycle begins all over again.
It often has to do with learning new things or having new experiences. I am a very curious person who is constantly learning new ideas, and I want to experince everything there is possible to experince in life. Last week when I was telling my dad I want to go to grad school because I'm bored, he was asking me "will you ever be satisfied in life?" I thought about it for a second and said "nope I think I get bored too easily". I've almost become addicted to this pattern of always conquering the next peak then feeling bored when I conquer it.
So it was much to my amazement this last weekend when I realized... that I actually like my life just the way it is. I've been feeling dissatisfied in life lately because I feel like I'm at a plateau and not moving forward anymore. I stopped to think about it though and asked myself what do I really want to change about my life right now? I couldn't really come up with a good answer. I have to admit, I like my friends, I like work, I like how I spend my free time, so I came to the conclusion that for the most part I really don't want much more in life. Finding someone who I can really care about is one thing, but I'm really in no hurry to find that special girl. Having more good friends would be cool but I already have the few close friends I need in life.
One of my good friends gave me this polished stone and said it was a "Gratitude Stone" and to keep it in my pocket so that everytime I felt it there I would remember to be grateful for the things I have in life which I often take for granted. I think I'll take his advice and keep it with me, its something that I often forget to do.
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| Its been a long while since I have written in my xanga. Its amazing how time flies by when you're busy, but also how being busy can actually be fun. Lately I've been busy at work a lot, waking up early and staying late. So I've started to become good friends with the people that I work with. Which is really weird since they're all like old more than twice my age, but I've discovered that we have many things in common. I've also discovered that you can learn a lot by listening to those old poeple, they have experienced a lot and can really give you a very differnt perspective on life and the things that are really important. So there is my short little xanga entry for the day. Its time to go home! lol
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| I was reminded today of why I really love this time of year. When I was little Christmas used to be my favorite holiday. It seemed like a magical time of year, when houses would become brightly lit at night by lights and ornaments, when people would be more giving and care about others, when me and my parents would go and find a new Christmas tree to bring home and decorate, and of course there were presents to look forward to! I remember one Christmas in particular when I really wanted a monopoly set and my dad knew it but he said no because I had already bugged him about a lot of other gifts and I knew I was going to get all of them (yes I was a lil spoiled brat back then). So then I felt sad because he wouldn't get it for me and threw a little tantrum but still he wouldn't give in. So then I forgot all about it for awhile until Christmas morning when I woke up and looked under the tree and saw this long flat box that that wasn't there the night before. I was like… wait is that what I think it is? My dad had went back to the store and got me the monopoly set and hid it away until Christmas day to surprise me. Its one of my favorite memories because I remember I felt so special and loved at that moment that I was just the happiest little boy in the world. I had never played monopoly before and my dad spent the rest of Christmas day teaching me how to play and after that we played it every weekend until it became my favorite board game.
As I grew older Christmas somewhat lost its magicalness for me. It was a pleasant time of year that I enjoyed but it was really just another holiday. The magicalness of Christmas came back for me though when I met my ex and we spent many Christmases together creating special memories through the years. We still keep in touch and catch up once in awhile to see how each other is doing in life. She happened to be in town today so we decided to go look at Christmas lights. It reminded me of the old days when we used to drive around and get lost together exploring new places and being carefree. It felt like old times again in that moment and I was really glad that we could share one more Christmas memory together. Emotions really are hard to explain at times, its interesting how you can feel really happy but feel a twinge of sadness at the same time. Some of those houses really were interesting though, some were bright and cheery and others just seemed kinda spooky. The imagination is a powerful thing lol.
So the first house I took a picture of positively looked spooky. Like it was pretty but you're looking at it with those blue lights and thinking... this looks like its out of a scary movie. It makes me think of Dracula trying to lure you in with that nice pretty Christmas tree in the window. Its a little late for Halloween lol.
This house was just bright. Like every open surface except the roof was covered with lights! The only thing I think that was missing was that the roof needs a really big "Merry Christmas" in big shiny lights on it.
Another well done house. This one wasn't too much bright lights but it was tastefully done.
And of course who could resist Winnie the Pooh?
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| Right before I went on vacation my IXUS 860 stopped working so most of these sometimes blurry pictures were taken by my N95. I don't like it when my favorite toys break :( So here are some random pictures from my recent travels.
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| I've been hit by the travel bug again, last week I was in Las Vegas and right now I'm at the airport in Vancouver waiting for my friend to come pick me up. Luckily they have free wireless here which lets me kill some time while I wait for him. I'll be posting pictures soon... more to come later :)
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